• Aman Shyamsukha

Pineapple on Pizza!!

For most of the human species,

Pizza is love and Pizza is life.

It's one of the most important innovations by mankind. Whenever the word pizza comes to your mind, you start imagining the bread with hard circular edges, filled with a lot of mouthwatering cheese and served with perfectly desired toppings like peppers, olives, sweetcorn, ham, paneer, mushrooms, pineapples and…. wait what….Pineapples?

Who the hell likes pineapple topping on a pizza?

I hope you don't but most of the Brits like it according to a recent survey in 2017. No wonder why they were kicked out of India.

It's been like ages since everyone has been fighting over the best toppings on a pizza. To settle this once and for all, YouGov conducted a survey in the UK to find out what really is the most liked pizza topping. And the results were shocking, obviously.

Mushrooms hold the number one position with 65% people wanting it in their pizza followed by onion with 62% and ham with 61%.

Mushrooms and onions? Seriously? (Totally not favoring a Jain Pizza here) But hold your tears as you will now see tears flooding out of your eyes because Pineapple was also in the list with 42% people in favour of it! This survey made the almighty god angry; you can see his blessings in 2020.

Most of the people whenever look at a pizza on their table, they start acting like a kid. This is how any normal mind works in this situation - the biggest piece or the maximum number of pieces should be mine. And trust me, this is normal. I myself start singing Twinkle Twinkle little star while eating pizza, By the way, this is my favourite song!

But now people are raging, they can't keep calm. They want justice, so they raised their voice against this pineapple topping. YouGov heard the voices of these people and conducted another survey specifically for this. Results made me think about being a hermit & going to the Himalayas.

This time 53% voted in favour that they want pineapple on pizza.

This is just like everyone said that they don't want Trump as president and still voted for him. After this, the only thing some people would want is to watch the world burn (counting myself among those people).

Wait a second, 12% of the sample population doesn't like pizza. Somebody hold me right now else I am going to hunt these 12% people down. Why on god's earth these people are still alive? People who voted in favor of pineapple argued that pineapple is good for health. Okay, on one side you are eating pizza which contains a high quantity of fat (definitely not good for your health) and on the other side you are concerned for your health. Readers, we should clap for these people.

Once the president of Iceland (which is green) sparked headlines with his desire to ban pineapple from pizza. That was my Hrithik Roshan Indian flag holding moment from the movie Lakshya. The president was later forced to clarify on his statement that it was just his personal desire and he did not have any power to create such a law in any case. Wow. I want Anil Kapoor of Nayak movie to replace this president for just one day. He is the best man suitable for this work.

If you ever wondered, how the US became a major power than the UK? Then the above image is the perfect answer for your question. These results are from a survey conducted in the US last year by YouGov. President Trump wanted America to be great again and he actually did it. Americans, now you can consider your vote for Trump.

What are your takes on this? Do you like pineapples on pizza? (Please say NO). We all at The Heptade love pizza and even if you like pineapple as a topping, we still love you (maybe). Just stick with us on our journey, maybe we will treat you with a pizza (not with pineapple topping).

........ If you want to read out my other articles, check them out here. Also, if you wish such freshly brewed content delivered right into your inbox, you can subscribe to our newsletter at the end of the page. Strictly, no spamming! I swear by Trump.

353 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

Crafted with love by The Heptade.